Running is something that I have learned to love. It makes me feel like I am on top of the world with no real reason to feel anything but amazing. Running lets me do things that other people either dont want to or believe they cant. Everyone can run . . . it is a constant internal battle to find the motivation and desire to keep going. I was at a party for friends of ours and everyone asked how I lost the weight. For me, its running and lifting that have made the biggest difference.
I started running a year and a half ago because my trainer believe it would be a good goal to complete a half marathon since the scale moving and smaller clothes size was not motivating me anymore. It was so hard at first, I can't lie. I had about sixteen weeks to train for Rock 'N' Roll half in July of 2012. I could not get through a long run without crying for whatever the reason may be. I finally ran an eight mile run and walked into the gym to stretch, shower and change for work. When I walked into the gym, my trainer asked how it went. My response was that it was the first long run I didnt have to walk for any part of and it was the first long run that I didnt cry at any time during. It was a huge accomplishment and even during the tough runs now, I hold onto that feeling.
Since I started running in April of 2012, I have run multiple 5k's, 10k's and three half marathons. I ran Rock n Roll in July 2012, Rockford Half in May 2013 and Rock n Roll in July 2013. These are the biggest accomplishments I have had with my races. Each half has gotten a little bit faster. This year the goal for Rock n Roll in July 2014 is to break a 2:30 half marathon. I have never been a runner. I hated every minute of running, but now I find myself craving an hour outside by myself to sort out my thoughts. I honestly feel myself craving a run when things are hectic or chaotic or just stressful. Running has become an outlet for me that I never want to lose.
The most frustrating part of running is the sprained ankles for me. I rolled my right ankle at mile 9 during Rockford Half last year. This took the eight weeks I had between Rockford and Rock n Roll down to only four weeks of running, after two weeks of nothing and two weeks on the bike. This was one of the hardest things for me since I was looking forward to Rock n Roll. I was still faster than at Rockford, but not as much as I wanted to be. It was a learned lesson for me to pay more attention to my surroundings and be aware of what I am doing while running. I have gotten into the habit of letting my brain shut down while running. I have since learned that no matter how much I have on my mind, I still need to focus on my form and my footings and my surroundings.
The past year and a half have taught me that I am capable of anything I put my mind to given enough time and the right coach. Sometimes I forget these details and doubt the training or the plan but I know deep down that as long as I trust the plan, I will be fine and ready and successful. It has been hard to trust the plan because it is not a plan I have created. It is usually a plan that was designed by my old trainer and as much as I trusted him, I doubted myself more often than not.
Running has helped me deal with death, depression, divorce and many other things. Running has allowed me to find myself and realize that I am good enough and I deserve to be happy no matter what I am doing in my life and that I deserve to have the support to be successful in any task I put my mind to. I hope everyone will be able to find the things that make them happy and the people who support them. It is important to do what makes you happy and healthy and makes life enjoyable. Once you have those, the rest fall into place. It may take more time than we want it to, but it does happy one step at a time.
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